Like a deal with God. These are the flush shifts that spin as a superlative emanation. A peak idea that issues a replacement of loss. I'm over it. My brain should be able to hold more than one thought.

I don't know whether to beg for this feeling to stay or if I should be writing about how relaxed and heavy I feel.
I guess, I could write about the words I use to describe this feeling, or I could describe this feeling. I'm indecisive towards what is actually and truly, worth writing about, in so many aspects, there are so many good things, so many feelings.
I discover this situation as another relapse to my losses, and how scared I am of losing more, once I'm there. 
So I write, but then I don't because I don't want to infatuate myself with one thing and let the other trail off into a tred I can't precipitate anything to let it survive and only minutes are almost as spasmodic as this is.

'We are who we are, we are what eachother is, we have no problem, we've been through fucking heaps of shit, but we are together - closer than ever. We have an understanding, known as 'the law of us'. It makes me so much more content that you fellow people have no judgements against one another, no matter, we pretty much roll by 'we got chow beck bro'. We are the family, trusting, caring, loving, supporting. Support, its nothing you just go on about 'everything will be ok, just hold tight, it'll all come around soon'. Even then if that's all that's mentions its that little extra support that is not just you can feel, it's that oblivious support. We only realise it when shit falls down and you know who's there when you need it, just by coincedence, work of god? I think so. Angels, i know so. Its that wordless support that means so much more. You just put a smile right on my dile bitch ass'.

I can't wait to feel peace within myself, with a home that I go back to. A bedroom that I finally can see four walls meet with bed sheets so bright I can just see them just trying to make me happy.

"It's just a belief, I just believe in positive and negative aspects. I mean there is so much more to life than what words describe, they're just powerful spaces of energy and we can't control them. They are so much more than the pathetic human beings we are."

4. I hate it when it's that hot, you're sweating but you're lying still.

I would try to explain my love for you but my incapabilities overcome my desire to explain.

"I want to tell you that I am in love your skin, your hair and your beautiful, chubby thighs. Your cosy stomach, your warm hugs and your killer smile.

But how can I? I know it's hard to see but I can't try any harder.

I find myself constantly screaming your name at the top of my lungs.. It's so hard to tell you with words. All I want and need is, "you're so fucking beautiful and I will love you no matter what. I will do anything in the world to make you happy and when you're feeling down, I'll give you your favourite hugs for the longest minute of your life and if you need or want another one? I'll give you two more. You make me feel like the luckiest man in the world."

Because Ally, baby, I want to give you the world though, I only have so much. I want to show you how much there is to give from my heart, but I just don't know how."

"It’s the inconceivable truth that kills us all starting for the inside then out, drives us to insanity and before we know we’re 6 feet under the ground lying in a wooden polished box.

The inconceivable truth about this for me is, that I kind of like the idea. Peace never was easy.

sunday jul 18 @ 12:50am"

"The world went cold, the earth shifted into an unrecognisable land, the people died, shrivelled with disease, turning into dust, into nothingness. I was the last one, standing, my feet plastered to the evil planet, my body solid and unchanging. I lived forever, just to see it all end."

"the unreal is more powerful then the real because nothing is perfect as you can imagine it because its only the intangible ideas, concepts beliefs religion fantasies thats last, the stone crumbles the wood rots people well they die but things as fragile as a thought a dream a legend they can go on."

lovecats